Hey, guys and girls. I decided to do rap battles between different heroes from the same category. Think about "Rap Battles of History", except with heroic characters. Each episode, the heroes will try to convince you they are better characters than their rivals.

Episode 1 - Mowgli vs Simba

For the first episode we have two orphans who are chased by evil big cats. Personally i like them both, but here, my votes aint relevant. It's all audience votes. 

Mowgli 2016

Mowgli: Grew up in the Jungles of India, Mowgli came to combine an animal toughness and human resourcefulness. The other animals looked down on him, if not outright tried to kill him/use him, yet he emerged victorious and earned his respect with fire and blood. In a movie representing the time where the British ruled India, Mowgli symbolize Mahatma Gandhi. Welcome to the jungle, Simba.

Simba smiling kindly

Simba: An exiled royalty who came back to his rightful throne, Simba is considered by many as the best lion ever. Brave, interesting character, have amusing moments while being serious when the time comes, even a pure soul to top it all. In a movie representing WW2, Simba symbolize Britain. Literally the British lion. Scar have a British accent, but Simba have a British spirit. Be prepared, Mowgle. Be very prepared.

Here we go:

Simba 1

Years went by and now i'm the king

both for the lions and Disney. And what's your thing?

Ask everyone you want. My movie was marvelous

but yours, i'm afraid, was just ridiculous

you had to do a remake, because the original was bad

flat characters and plot holes. Disney must've gone mad

raised by wolves? Are you freaking real?

I saw more realism in Silent Hill

You fought against one tiger. I fought against a pack

of hyenas and my uncle. If you fought them, you would've never come back

Mowgli 1

Dont teach me how to survive

i fought a tiger and stayed alive

you had a pack of lionesses, or else you would be dead

i defeated Shere Khan by using my head

You didn't killed Scar. The hyenas did your job

and you were a grown lion. I won Shere Khan as just a man-cub

you talk about Disney, but buddy, i'm sorry

you should know Rudyard Kipling wrote my story

you chose Hakuna Matata over history

How you're still a king? That's a mystery

Simba 2

I lived on bugs for years. What can you say for yourself?

I see your rib cage. You ain't in good health

you claim to be smart, but beating you is a piece of cake

what kind of dope would trust a snake?

You looked in her eyes and gave in to her hug

if it wasn't for Baloo, you would be already got hanged

you had the gift of fire, but you burned your own house

it was like giving magic and brooms to mickey mouse

come see me in Broadway and maybe you'll learn

how to do a musical which people truely yearn

Mowgli 2

You had Timon and Pumba? I have Baloo and Bagheera

it's like you're Miley cyrus and i'm Shakira

whether you're alone or together with your wife

one day you'll fall. It's the circle of life

being fooled by Kaa doesnt make me a novice

your uncle hated you for years. How could you not notice?

Instead of dealing with life, you ran to the desert

when i dealt with shit, i became an expert

while both of us got to the end of the rope

you gave in to despair and i kept on dear hope

Who won? Who's the best? You decide!

Verdict: 7 votes, 6 for Mowgli and 1 for Simba..

The winner is: Mowgli. Sorry, Simba. It's the circle of life.

Episode 2 - Dorothy Gale vs Alice Kingsleigh

For the second episode we have two girls who got stranded in fairytale lands. Personally i like Alice better, but here, my votes aint relevant. It's all audience votes.

Dorothy Gale

Dorothy Gale: Once a humble farm girl, now a famous witch-slayer. the Scarecrow, the cowardly lion and the Tin-man will tell you that Dorothy knows just how to bring the best, smartest and bravest out of anyone. You better pull a white rabbit out of your hat, Alice. If you won't, off with your head!


Alice Kingsleigh: Whether in the higher levels of British society or at the Underland, Alice always emerges as a queen. As an uncrowned queen, Alice's morning routine include 6 Impossible Things Before Breakfast. Be careful, Dorothy. You're not in Kansas anymore.

Here we go:

Dorothy 1

Alice, my dear, get out of your trip

your size shifting just gives me the creeps

the mad hatter and the caterpillar must be on crack

How the white rabbit didnt got an heart attack?

These are your friends? Are you that desperate?

How much weed brownies and mushroom did you ate?

Maybe here in Wonderland you're the ace

but if you fought flying monkeys, they would've chewed your face

your queen doesnt scare me. She can scream until the rapture

after killing a witch, i can definitely have her captured

Alice 1

Maybe we can meet half way, but not at the Yellow Brick Road

it led you to a "mentor" who turned out to be a fraud

your witch is made of sugar, so dont get cocky

unlike you, i slayed the Jabberwocky

what Oz knows about hardship? His life are rather plain

Mad Hatter lost his whole family and stayed relatively sane

your teeny winnie dog can't bark, not to mention can't bite

you can't survive Prince Blackheart, 'cause you dont have the might

Red Queen will catch your lion and turn him into a rug

she'll also smoke Scarecrow and get Tin-man hanged

Dorothy 2

Your kingdom is rotten, just like in Hamlet

your mayor is an egg. He should've been an omelet

take me one day to Salazen Grum

i can teach your friends how to survive a storm

Tornado is on its way. There's no time for tea

I survived, but you won't. You will never be me

my friends and dog are loyal through the cold and the fire

your cat is all smiles, but he's a psycho for hire

Tweedle Dee, Tweedle Dum and the rest of your bunch

are what the Tin-man calls "suckers" and lion calls "lunch"

Alice 2

Each day, before breakfast, i do 6 impossible things

what have you done in your life, except feeding cows and pigs?

There's no place like home, but you stayed there for too long

you talk about flying monkeys? I wanna see you against King Kong

have you ever wore an armor? Have you ever held a sword?

If you want to be a queen, you have to fight for this world

Lewis Carol's humor got people curious

Ask Frank L. Baum for me: Why so serious?

Read my book and you'll learn how to be both funny and intriguing

and maybe you'll become a girl worth keeping

Who won? Who's the best? You decide!

Verdict: 5 votes. 2 for Dorothy and 3 for Alice.

The winner is: Alice. Sorry, Dorothy. Off with your head.

Episode 3 - Blue vs Aladar

For the third episode we have two charismatic dinosaurs, who discovered leadership in hard times. Personally i like Blue better, but here, my votes aint relevant. It's all audience votes.

Blue protecting Owen from the Indoraptor

Blue: Born to be a leader, Blue will fiercely protect her friends, pack mates and even little girls. You can count on her she'll save the day, both from bloodthirsty hybrids and greedy psychopaths, jumping into action like a ray of sunshine through heavy clouds. Welcome to Jurassic World, Aladar.


Aladar: Long before Moses, Aladar was already a prophet and leader to his people. For him, the end of the world is just another beginning. Neither carnotaurs, political rivals or even an apocalyptic desert won't stop him in his journey to the promised land. Run away, Blue. The herd is coming.


Here we go:

Blue 1

Welcome to the real world, with humans all around

you should be so lucky if they'll just put you in a pound

you have sharp thumbs and sheere bulk. Isn't that cute?

Men have guns and missiles. You should pray they won't shoot

if you want to face me, you better take caution

remember i sent Indominus-Rex to the buttom of the ocean

Kron took you down with ease and cut you like a knife

I took Indoraptor to the roof top and made him hold for dear life

all you did was driving Carno to the cliff and let him fall

i went in James Arthur's way and did the impossible

Aladar 1

A leader you turned turn out to be. Your whole family is dead

and your friends are away. Soon you'll be unheard

Indominus-Rex was crazy, yet you took her word

led your sisters to kill innocents as if you were a horde

Explain me something. I thought raptors are bright

how could you choose I-Rex's might over Owen's right?

whenever someone wasn't your friend, you told them "get lost!"

A true hero save even those who wish him the worst

i brought my people to heaven. You brought yourself to hell

now when you're in California, good luck finding an hotel

Blue 2

I killed Indoraptor at a stormy night

if you met him on broad day, you'd urinate in fright

your attempt to save Kron ended up as a failure

I tamed a t-rex and emerged superior

when the meteor fell, you could jump into the water

try escaping from a volcano. Even the ocean would get hotter

mercenaries all around me, plus a carnotaur of my own

just like the one you killed, it was a brainless brawn

i saved the day from Jack the Ripper and Ted Bundy

dont try this at home. You aint compatible, buddy

Aladar 2

All you know about life comes from your personal trainer

i got along without guidance. I'm just a fast learner

I-Rex wasn't that strong. You and Rexy got her crushed

the carnotaurs got burried under rocks, but one survived unscratched

i made my herd stand together and showed them the way

If the apatosaurs had me, I-Rex could never get away

Indoraptor was an abomination

the carnotaurs were god's creation

your prey items were engineered and relied too much on nurture

come to me and learn to survive the real nature

Who won? Who's the best? You decide!

Verdict: 5 vote. 3 for Aladar and 2 for Blue.

The winner is: Aladar. Welcome to Jurassic Disney.

Episode 4 - Charlie Barkin vs Copper

For the fourth episode we have two heroic dogs who had very dark and troubled times. Personally i like Charlie better, but here, my votes aint relevant. It's all audience votes.

Charlie B. Barkin

Charlie: Grew up in the cold streets of New York, Charlie navigated his way between his treacherous partner Carface, cycle of crime and attempts to keep his heart is the right place. When life gave him a second chance, he used it to save Anne-Marie, and as a result, his own soul. Don't even try, Copper. You cant keep a good dog down.


Copper: Grew up in a farm on the countryside, Copper faced a great test when his friend Todd clashed with his master Amos. Once leading his master to his quarry using his nose, now leading himself to home using his heart. Be careful, Charlie. The hunt is on.

Here we go:

Copper 1

I cant keep a good dog down, but you are bad

worked with mobsters and psychopaths, and you ended up dead

you saved a girl from prostitution, but your intents were the same

even gambled on her life. For you, it was just a game

once again, your clock is ticking. You better run

before my master will come and blow your head with his gun

You call yourself a tough guy? Chief is tougher by far

he survived a train. You got killed by a simple car

you got a second life because you screwed-up the first

whether a dog or an angel, you'll never be the best

Charlie 1

You ain't nothing but a hound dog. Cry all the time

you lived in a farm? I survived a life of crime

Tod was your homeboy, but you pushed him away

after everything you did, he still decided to stay

he didnt ran Chief over. He didn't wish for the train disaster

if you want someone to blame, why won't you blame your master?

The fool took you to a goose chase, deep into the woods 

he aint much as a hunter. Just a little red riding hood

all his shots achieved was a pissed-off bear

you were lucky as hell that Tod was there

Copper 2

I have a nose both for friends and for hunting

your partner stabbed you in the back and your never saw it coming

go and impress angels and gators. That's a piece of cake

i fought a pissed-off bear. His roars of pain were not fake

you berate me for choosing my family over Tod?

What would you do if Anne-Marie and your friends were at odds?

You forget i let Tod flee, and later stood back by his side

before you met Anne-Marie, you cared only for your own hide

you had your gator lover to execuse your revenge

me and Tod, on our own, sent the bear from the edge

Charlie 2

look me in the eyes. Do you think you'll go to heaven?

After almost killing Tod with a bloodthirst of a raven?

I took care of my girl and fought for her without bend

you were loyal to your master, but betrayed your friend

until you stood to your master, you left a big bloodstain

and now you and Tod will never meet again

I have to admit, your movie was a work of art

but next time you meet a friend, listen to your heart

your clock is ticking too. some day you won't be alive

but if you'll be a good dog, your love will survive

Who won? Who's the best? You decide!

Verdict: 4 vote for Charlie.

Episode 5 - Prince Dastan vs Randy Meeks

For the fifth episode we have two savvy survivors who knows the rules to the letter. Personally i like them both, but here, my votes ain't relevant. It's all audience votes.​​​​​

Prince Danstan

Prince Dastan: Once a street urchin, now a prince, always come on top just in time. His bravery, resourcefulness and success at defeating his evil uncle make some people see him as the love child of Simba and Aladdin. Bow down, Randy. You just know the rules. Dastan makes them.

Randy Meeks

Randy Meeks: As one of the survivors of the original Woodsboro murders and an horror movies expert, Randy already looked the death right in the eye and never blinked, not even when he was shot and stabbed. His devotion to Sidney Prescott and meta insights made him into the most popular victim of his franchise. Don't be cocky, Dastan. There are certain rules, and you are not above them.

Here we go

Dastan 1

Bow down before me, geek. Dont think you're groovy

you're a veteran survivor? Well, not in my movie

i came from the streets and gained an empire

If you were in my shoes, your conditions would be dire

"you can never have sex"? Speak for yourself

when you finally did it, you went to Pennywise's turf

don't try to reach to top. You're not built for these heights

you'll always be a squire, but girls wants a knight

you should've known your low status couldn't be any clearer

when Sidney turned you down in the favor of a killer

Randy 1

There are certain rules to win a rap battle

rule number 1: More bite and less rattle

rule number 2: Don't waste your time

here, in the real world, you worth less than a dime

we have Sherk these days, and meta jokes as the standard

you're just a cliche, whose princess almost left stranded

when your brothers mistrusted you, they treated you like a flat tire

when Sidney suspected me, she held her fire

your day will come, and you'll be buried in the desert

but everyone will remember the meta expert

Dastan 2

I watched your movie. How did it end?

Oh yeah! An old woman stabbed you really bad

you were killed by a cat lady, so don't blow your own horn

stay home and play games. You can never achieve the throne

for all your troubles, you just lost your head

face it. You're symbolic just because you're dead

my princess takes me for the worlds. She makes me feel like a god

Sidney took you for granted. You're just the last friend she had

if success was a crime, you would never be a suspect

dont pretend to be a prophet. You're just a subject

Randy 2

Well excuse me, your highness, for not answering your call

go play in your palace. Living in Woodsboro takes balls

you changed time all the time. No hardship stayed for long

i talk bravely to my killer, despite knowing it's wrong

you have super powers. Dont tell me about pain

i helped Sidney on her quest by using my brain

my friends remember me. Have you left any of those?

Will they be there for you when your reign will come to a close?

i have a feeling your demise will be infernal

you rule the sands of time, but my rules are eternal

Who won? Who's the best? You decide!

Verdict: 5 vote for Randy.


Due to difficulties and new plans, this season is on hold until further notice. I didn't cancel the season yet. Just putting it on hold, hopefully I could finish it some day.

Episode 6 - Vampire Slayers

Episode 7 - Warlords

Episode 8 - Guardian Bears

Episode 9 - Superheroines

Episode 10 - Final Girls

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